Advice I've ignored
By Rob Green, Founder, The GRM Group.
Throughout our lives, we often encounter a chorus of advice from friends, family, and society at large, cautioning us against certain choices.
These warnings can stem from a place of love and concern, but they can also stifle our individuality and sense of adventure.
It won't always be a "don't do that", but it might be a "Are you sure?”...which can sometimes be just as powerful to the doubting mind.
In my journey, I have embraced the unconventional, taking bold steps that others urged me to avoid.
From pursuing unexpected career paths to embarking on spontaneous travels, each decision has shaped my identity and enriched my experiences in ways I could never have anticipated.
In this article, I will share some of the most significant things I've done that people told me not to do, exploring the lessons learned and the freedom found in defying conventional wisdom.
Join me as we celebrate the power of choice and the beauty of forging our own paths, and ignoring those that hate us that dream big.
“Don't leave your home town, you’ll fall behind” (said to me by a friend before we moved away when I was 16 years old).
“Don't study that” (said to me by a girlfriend who thought my Leisure Management course at college was pointless - but that short course was my route to University, it was the tool to get me into Uni, I passed it, I got into Uni and I cannot remember one thing I “learned” on that course!!)
“Why move back to London?” (said by a friend who thought London would be a disaster for me")
“Don’t buy a house” (told to me that property would drain me of all my money and that its better to rent)
“Get a mortgage, its an asset” (someone said this…..hmmm….not sure about this…)
“Rent isn’t waste” (Well….yeah….it is. But I suppose you can justify renting in a city if you have to be close to work etc etc….but paying off someone else’s debt? Thats a waste in my eyes)
“Don’t backpack through Kenya” (In 2001, my dear late mum said this to me, then I did it anyway and it was an amazing)
“Don't run the London marathon with no training” (I accepted the place in the Marathon with 8 weeks to go, I didn’t train, I didn’t have running shoes (just street shoes), I did it anyway - I still have the medal in the office, it reminds me of Mind over Matter).
“Don't go to Thailand on your own” (after a breakup, I was broken - and I needed to get away, a friend told me it would be silly to go to these remote places on my own…I did it anyway, and the memories will live with me forever)
“Don't move into recruitment” (advice that I ignored, and this career move set me up for life)
“Don't leave the UK” (another colleague who thought my career would be going backwards….little did he know the pull was too strong!!)
“Don’t move to Cayman” (we couldn’t even find it on a map….but the move that my friend advised me against, turned out to be a defining moment in my life).
“Don't buy a house in Cayman” (it gets flooded, there are hurricanes, its the top of the market, you’ll never come back…etc etc - the purchase I made, when I sold it 15 years later, meant I bought my family home, for cash”)
“Don't get married” (more tongue in cheek than serious, from a friend, who was worried he’d never see me again….well, he’s still a friend, and I am still married…so he was wrong”)
“Don't move to Hong Kong in the middle of the Financial crisis” (I was offered partnership in a new company, to go to HK, it was Dec 2008…the world was in turmoil, no one was hiring, and I was starting a recruitment business with the dream of being the number 1 out of 4500 recruitment agencies in the city.)
“Don't start a business in this climate” (one of the partners in the business said this, and I talked him round….thankfully for both of us)
“Just walk away” (As the financial crisis was taking more of a hold, our houses we owned had no tenants in, for almost a whole year. This was putting an enormous strain on us and draining all our money, having to continue to pay the bonds - a friend of mine - who was a very clever guy at a Hedge Fund - advised me to “leave the keys in the door and walk away”….I am so pleased I didn’t listen, I fought through it and managed to keep the properties”
“Don't buy Bitcoin” (In 2013 a colleague started talking about BTC, I went to my friends in finance, and they all said…all of them….that it was fake, a scam, a waste…but I ignored them, bought a handful of coins, and keep them all to this day. And I have stacked more since)
“Don't do an MBO” (Also 2013, I paid for a Consultant to advise me on my options for growing or exiting the business I was in with two partners, he kept trying to advise me to just walk away, not pay them anything, take the business, database and staff and just walk away - It felt right in my gut to offer them a fair value price, thats who I am, thats how I was brought up…to do the right thing…so thats what I did)
“Don't open an office in Japan” (I was strongly advised, I ignored it, it cost me a lot of money, but taught me some incredible lessons, so it was definitely not a loss)
“Don't open an office in Australia” (Another piece of advice I ignored and we did very well for the 3 years we had an office there, then I closed it, but continue to work in the country remotely, so its been a big success for us)
“Why would you want to open an office in Africa?” (in 2013 I made the decision that Asia was fast becoming saturated, it seemed that growth had peaked….I decided my future would be Africa, so opened an office in Johannesburg….I was advised not to…they were wrong)
“Why don't you do something other than law?” (has been said to me many times over 22 years, but I stay loyal to the industry we know well)
“Don’t climb that!” (After my Mum died, I decided to climb two of Asias biggest mountains, on the same day, one after the other, with zero training. I was advised not too, I ignored them, I did it and I got to celebrate my mums life by pushing myself to do something I couldn’t do, to push the limits, in a similar (but much less) way that she faced chemo 7 times….just to keep herself alive for us)
“Why are you moving there?” (in 2016 I decided we would move to South Africa, many thought I was being silly, financially, opportunity, safety and many other reasons not to move to SA were presented to me…but we did it, and have not looked back. It was important to me that my wife and kids are near their family.)
“Are you not over it yet?” (specifically about the loss of my mother, someone asked me this a year after her death - the answer was no, and I’ll take as long as I want)
“Don’t post that! You must be brave”… (referring to social media. My views are my own, I don’t care what people think, my views may sometimes be wrong and I am prepared to apologise if they are factually wrong, and to have my mind changed - but I really don’t care what people think - its no reflection on me as a businessman, as a father, a friend, a husband and a leader).
“What do you know about (enter any market we’ve worked in)?” (Always being advised to think less big, and I am always ignoring them, because they are wrong, and they are not me)
“Why are you giving up drinking?” (In 2021 I decided I had reached the end of my alcohol career. Life has gotten much better since)
“Therapy is for weak people” (I completely disagree, if you need someone to talk to, reach out - I spent about 3 years doing it, it was great)
“You let your doctor do what?” (Every year I get a full medical - I am flabbergasted by how many friends of mine, especially men, who don’t get the full check up….this is how illnesses go undetected - go to the docs, every year..especially as you get older)
“Don't buy XRP, ADA, ETH, SOL (insert other crypto)” (Another load of financial advice by people who read the headlines and don’t understand the technology behind it)
“Why are you going there?” (Strange how many people try to talk you out of going somewhere before you’ve been there, because they’ve “heard things”..Riyadh and Myanmar in particular - unless its a war zone, I will ignore and will continue to travel this beautiful world - these experiences add something to me as a family man and business leader)
“Why are you buying a house there?” (Another gem from someone when I sold a house to buy our home in Cape Town…they were wrong)
“Don’t pay off your whole mortgage, keep a little of the debt” (Some will agree with this, others won’t and it’s up to you, but I paid off our bonds, and put all that money into investment plans…it helps me sleep better”
“Are you sure you should be doing that?” (This was a question when I said we would be launching our Events company, so far its been great in 2025 we will be in Cape Town, Johannesburg, Amsterdam, New York, Sao Paolo and Cairo…good times ahead).
**I am sure there are many, many more, but I can’t remember all them.**
And this is not counting the times I was told “don’t invest in that”, “don’t hire that guy” "don't drink that", "don't smoke that", "don't take that", "don't date her", "don't go there"
And I ignored them all.
And boy….am I glad I did….but my word, do people like to have opinions for what other people should do!!?
I sit here, content, happy in my own skin, happy with who I am, not worried about what others are doing with their decisions - thats up to them.
I have two beautiful, happy children, one of which has blessed us with his special needs.
I have a wife of 20 years, two incredible dogs, a fulfilled career that has taken me to live on 4 continents and to close deals in 56 cities so far, in what has been to date, a truly challenging and wonderful, international career.
I didn’t do well at school, but took an alternative route to University and obtained my degree (the first person in my entire family), and I continue to have a healthy appetite for learning to this day. I built a library in my home and I consume an unhealthy amount of books and podcasts - all to help me to be better at every aspect of my life, mainly to benefit those around me and feed my thirst for knowledge of the world around us.
I’ve never been scared of not knowing or being wrong.
I know what its like to have loved and lost; friends, family and partners. I have spoken at huge industry events, sung on stage (I can’t sing), advised market leaders on business strategy from Beijing to the Bahamas, been quoted in the WSJ/FT/Economist, been live on TV, Radio and Online for business, and for sport.
I’ve seen the best bands in the world live, from Oasis to Paul Weller, to Coldplay to Galliano, I’ve seen some of the greatest musicians, comedians and orchestra/conductors from Chucho Valdes and Jiří Bělohlávek, from Ricky Gervais to Jimmy Carr, all incredible artists - and I’ve been inspired by some of the most impressive plays, musicals and operas, in both New York and London that still inspire me to this day.
I’ve travelled the world, watched the heavyweight championship from ringside, and cup finals at Wembley, sat and watched Roger and Serena win Wimbledon on Centre Court, Gerrard score at Anfield, Stokes score 260 at Newlands, watched the AFL at the MCG, cheered Frankie to a winner at Ascot, seen the Knicks win at the Garden, and England win at Lords. I started a soccer club for children with special needs and have been the ring announcer for a championship fight, live on national TV.
I’ve embarrassed myself in front of Gordon Ramsey, and had a big night out with famous sports stars and celebrities. I’ve met royalty (although I was quite young at the time) and some of the most successful names in business.
I’ve woken up in Vegas with Caesars Palace chips in my pocket, not knowing how I won so much, I’ve watched a spewing Volcano in Costa Rica and boated into Niagara Falls, climbed to Machu Picchu, ridden water rapids in South America, been to the Sydney Opera House, scuba dived the Wall in Little Cayman, free jumped at the X games, rode a gondola in Venice, and seen an “interesting” show in Bangkok. I’ve said a prayer at a Buddhist temple at the top of a Mountain, and drank a Guinness at the highest pub in the world, and now I live directly under the awe-inspiring Table Mountain.
I’ve slept under the stars in the African veld, swam in the Caribbean Sea, been to the top of the Swiss Alps, surfed off Santa Cruz, heard the beautiful sound of prayer call in Riyadh and the bells of St Pauls Cathedral. And drifted peacefully over England in a hot air balloon.
I’ve marvelled at Rothko, Gursky, Van Gogh’s Sunflowers and the Sagrada Familia, all the while tried to wrap my head around what we have done to deserve the beauty of the planet we have been given, and wondered at what men and women have achieved.
I’ve hunted for my food with just a rod and rifle, and been both rich and very poor, I’ve battled addictions and won. I’ve been lost, and found myself again - I have built strong foundations and had those foundations taken away, and rebuilt them again.
I have read enough to know how our world works, gave up on legacy media early, learned not to trust politicians and most corporations, and certainly go nowhere near Facebook, Instagram, or TikTok - I’ve lived under capitalism and communism, and Capitalism should win every single time.
I’ve climbed mountains, been to full moon parties, dived off 100-million dollar yachts into the clear blue ocean, won major industry awards, built a respected podcast, built a number of successful businesses, and had a few big failures along the way, just to keep me humble.
I’ve built a financial legacy and security for my kids and their own future families. I have zero debt, I have a diverse portfolio, I love the people I work with, and I have my health - I pick the clients that get the chance to work with us.
I am the master of my own destiny and believe those around me should also have the same freedoms.
Not bad for the working class son of a postman
I started from zero and you can too.
It takes extreme hard work and a healthy amount of risk tolerance, and no fear of starting again.
But the most important thing to remember is - please - do not care what other people think of you, do what you think is right for you, and be undeniable - get out there, and go for it.
I work extremely hard - its in my genes, I am #relentless. No one will beat me. I will not stop.
Of course there are daily issues, none of us are truly content all the time, but the lessons for you here are simple:
Trust yourself - Trust your gut
Don’t be afraid to make mistakes
F**k everyone else - do what you want to do, its not their life, its yours
Don’t ever stop moving forward
Get after it every day, don’t be lazy, get up and get out there
Hustle - because no one is going to hustle for you
Want to talk it through? Message me rob@thegrmgroup.com